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How to act if others scold my child


In the park, in the supermarket, on the street, at a relative's house, at a friend's house, etc. They are all places where the child may fight with another, cry, yell, have a tantrum and where an adult, who is not the parent, scolds him. But, How should I act if others scold my child?

When another person is the one who reprimands the child, a immediate reaction of anger feeling that his fatherhood and his parenting model are questioned.

However, there are factors that modulate this reaction of parents to the situation that another adult is the one who scolds their child. For example, for many parents it will not be the same that the one who scolds their child is someone completely unknown or a relative. Emotional bonding influences the reaction.

It will also be important if it has been done calmly and good words have been used when reprimanding the child or, instead, it has been done with bad words and in an aggressive way.

Another factor to look at will be if the father himself is present while another scolds his son and if he does so in a public place.

And, above all, we must pay attention to why one adult scolds the child of another. Does he do it because the child shows uncivil behavior or because the little one is doing something that bothers that adult?

Be that as it may, there are 4 different ways to react to this situation:

1 - We cannot speak in a correct way when reacting. It will depend on the situation, who is the person who is fighting the child and the personality of the parents.

2 - What should be clear is that when it comes to scolding the child, their own parents will do it. What's more, parents have the legitimacy to decide who else can do it.

3 - If another adult scolds the child and you do not agree to do so, you should not berate and openly show anger. Parents are the model of the child and that is why it is necessary to try to avoid aggressiveness to convey to the child that there are other types of ways to resolve conflicts without using violence. That is to say, teach the child that the response to misbehavior should not be other misbehavior.

4 - If the adult who scolds the child is a close relative for example and does not want to disavow him in front of the child, he can talk apart with the other adult to show disagreement and then do it with the child to make sure they understand what has happened.

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